Soap, Anyone?

Yesterday, I wrote about my daughter calling her younger brother an, “old bitch.”

And here I was thinking that was the topper to my day. Nope.

After work, I picked my youngest up from preschool. We headed to the store to buy a gift for a birthday party we were headed to. He proceeded to go limp in the entry of the store – angry that I would not let him ride the coin-operated truck in the entrance. (Evil, non-children-having people put those there, by the way. The same people who put candy and small toys at the checkout line.)

As he worked his “Civil Disobedience” tactics, laying prone on the floor like a 40 pound sack of jello, I began receiving the looks. Other customers attempted to walk past me and my writhing child as I scolded him for his inappropriate behavior. I only tell you this detail, so you can fully understand my evening better.

Once we made it to the birthday party (which we nearly did not go to after that ugly display – he did say sorry, though) my three-year old boy sat in my lap, quietly enjoying the birthday party – preparing for pizza and cake and all the birthday fun. Then, while all the other parents and friends had gathered around – he, very clearly, said at the top of his lungs, “BITCH! BITCH, BITCH, BITCH, BITCH.” He said this all with a smile on his face.

If you have any spare bars of soap floating around your house, send them my way. We’ve got a bad-word habit to break.

What’s the worst word your kiddo has said in a public place?

Quick Question

What do you do when…

Your 10-year-old daughter calls your seven-year old son an, “old bitch”?

(She then followed up by saying she actually said, “you’re mean.” Um, not quite.)

 

Say What?!

Raise your hand if your kid has ever dropped the F bomb.

 

Sorry, had to get both hands back on the keyboard. Yes, of course, my kids have said the F word. I’m a journalist. What can I say?

Despite the many naughty words that have come out of my mouth, I was actually shocked to hear the phrase my kindergartener muttered the other night. Let me set this up for you.

We were getting ready for bed. I asked my third grader to get her younger brothers’ toothbrushes ready for them while I was getting my toddler dressed in his jammies. She got her own ready and the baby’s, but somehow left her six-year-old brother’s toothbrush dry. When she walked away my kindergartener said, “That dirty bastard.”

Okay now. Really? I tried, desperately, to stifle a laugh. I held the tears in while I choked out the mandatory mom question: “Where did you hear such language?!” (I only use that “Dirty Bastard” phrase at work, and mostly it’s directed at my computer.)

His response? “TV!”

I relayed this story to a girlfriend the other night. She shared a few stories with me but has forbidden me to share them here. So folks, it’s up to you. Tell me all your horror stories of when your kids have said something that had you trying not to laugh as you threatened to wash out their mouths with soap. Oh, and do you actually wash your kids mouths out with soap? I vaguely recall talking with a friend as a child about tasting the soap ahead of time to see which ones tasted okay… just in case.