Touchy Feely

So… apparently too much love is a bad thing, at least in some settings.

My three-year old got a “yellow light” in school today. (That’s a bad thing.) The teacher said it was because he was, “having a hard time keeping his hands to himself and not on his friends.” She went on to explain, he wasn’t being aggressive, he just wouldn’t keep his hands to himself. When I asked my little one why he got a “yellow light,” he said it was because he “wasn’t listening.” Not listening and keeping his hands to himself are two different things, I told him. He said he got into trouble because he was “snuggling” his friend. I asked if his friend had asked him to stop snuggling him. He said no. “Snuggling” in our house is a full body cuddle. I guess that’s looked down upon in preschool.

The more I think about this, the more questions I have.

Did he get in trouble because they were supposed to be napping and he wouldn’t stop touching his friend?

Did he get in trouble because he was snuggling another little boy?

Did he get in trouble because his friend didn’t want him touching him?

You see, the more I think about it – the more I wonder what really happened. Since when is cuddling a crime? For most “yellow light” offenses, he has some sort of consequence. But, I just can’t punish him for a simple snuggle.

How would you handle this one?



3 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Amy
    May 14, 2013 @ 00:25:20

    I would just let the preschool handle it. At the point that you find out about it, its so far after any bad behavior that I don’t think your 3 year old would connect the punishment with the behavior you’re looking to correct. (whatever that is!)


  2. mommyof2boyzntx
    May 14, 2013 @ 00:28:08

    I get nervous when a classmate of the boys’ hugs me when they see me…I used to substitute and policy is that u r really not supposed to allow a child to hug you…morally, turning/pushing away a child who wants to hug you or hold your hand…I understand the “liability” but some kids crave a little affection/attention/love….My 6 yr old got into trouble for being “chatty” but not for “not listening”…I understand you on that issue


  3. Stephanie B.
    May 15, 2013 @ 10:07:06

    I honestly don’t know how I would handle that. I think I wouldn’t punish but would try to explain that cuddling is ok to do with the family at home but not at school with friends.


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