The Biter is Back

It was just last week when I wrote about my toddler biting my kindergartener on the butt. Well, he’s struck again. This time it was at day care.

Biting seems to be the plague of day cares. You shove a ton of kids who can’t clearly communicate into an environment where there’s only so many toys to play with and you are setting yourself up for disaster.

Steal my toy? Bite!

Don’t wanna play with me? Chomp!

Get too close to me and make me think you’re going to steal my toy? Nip!

Pretty much any situation can end with a flesh wound. The experts say it stems from a toddler’s frustration or inability to communicate. They offer solutions on how to get them to stop. But, when it’s your kid that gets in trouble for sinking their teeth into another kid at day care, yikes!

These days, to protect the kids, they don’t tell you who did the biting or who was bitten, beyond how your own child was involved. They probably want to make sure you don’t go after some punk toddler.

The idea that my kid was the aggressor in this incident got me thinking about the broader issue of when your kid is in trouble. There’s a certain degree of shame involved. Maybe there shouldn’t be. But, I do feel bad for the other child who was bitten. My toddler is a little too young to go write a letter of apology.

How do you handle it when your kid is the aggressor? From babies to kindergarteners to high schoolers… any of them can snap. What do you do when they do?



4 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Peggy
    Jan 12, 2012 @ 13:26:22

    My oldest was a daycare (and elsewhere) biter. I did my research so when they asked if they (the teachers) could bite her back when she bit a child and I offered an alternative method, they just looked at me like I had two heads and eight eyes. So, against my better judgement, I relented and signed a permission slip allowing them. She bit a child, they bit her. The only thing *that* taught her was that biting was okay. She continued to bite other kids and got 86ed out of the place.
    So I decided to try a method I read about online. The next time she bit someone, I took her arm, opened her mouth, inserted her arm and clamped her mouth shut, hard. I only had to do it one more time for her to get it. She quit biting after that. It also worked for eye-poking, hair-pulling, and other hurtful behaviors.


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