Adventures in Potty Training

I wanted to call this post “Poop, Poop Everywhere.” And yet, I restrained myself. Now, if only my toddler would do the same.

I had this foolish idea. Recall my previous “Brilliant Mom Ideas.” Yep, like the tent. I had this stupid, stupid, smart idea that I would start potty training my 18 month old. He’s been noticing when things are happening, so it seemed like the right thing to do. Even other people were noticing that he seemed to be ready to try. So, I gave it a try. Stupid. Stupid me.

The day started off okay. That is, until I realized I didn’t have any training pants. Nor did I have any underwear that fit my toddler. Slight snag. I put him in a pair of his big brother’s Scooby Doo boxers. Looking back, Doo should have been my first clue as to how the day would turn out.

I set the timer. We went to the bathroom every 30 minutes, and frankly any time in between when he looked even mildly like he might have to go. Of course, he sat on the little potty and did nothing. The first time, he didn’t want to sit there, so I bribed him with a jelly bean. He sat. He ate. Nothing else transpired.

Half an hour later, we sat on the potty again. Nothing. I ran water. Nothing. A few hours went by, without a drop. I pumped him full of fluids. Nothing. Then, we left the house for a midday appointment. He went back in the diaper. Cleaning up accidents at home is one thing, I’m not about to do it at the doctor’s office.

While we were out and about, I stopped at the store and bought him a pack of size 2 little tighty whities. Too cute. When we got home, I put him in them, while explaining how he was a big boy and how he needed to tell mommy when he had to go potty. I watched him, like a hawk, until shortly after dinner. I was cleaning. He was messing. While packing the last green beans into the container for the fridge, I spotted it: a big brown spot in those clean white underwear. I wiped him down, scraped it out and then put the new undies in the wash.

Back into the Doo boxers he went, which very quickly earned their name. We went for a walk. I scooped the poop for the canine of the family. But, all was clear on the western front for the baby, until we came back home. Standing in the kitchen, he let out a fart. I made a comment like “Is that a warning shot?” My snarky remark soon came true. A few minutes later, I smelled it. Sure enough, he put the doo in Scooby Doo. Another round of wipe and scrape.

I had all about given up this whole potty training business, when I walked into the living room. What did I see? A nice, wet pile of crap. I can only assume it was from the dog, who didn’t want to go back outside in the rain. Like I said, poop, poop, everywhere.

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3 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Mom's Place of Sanity
    Jul 20, 2011 @ 01:38:45

    I had a little chuckle while reading this. I know exactly how you feel. We started potty training my son around the same time, and its been quite an adventure with it. He will be 2 in 9days and we are still working on it. It gets annoying at times, but its part of life we parents have to go thru. My son one time had gone on the potty and about 2mins later he goes and poops on our carpet. Its like you couldn’t take 10steps and sit on the potty? I really do wish you the best of luck and hope he starts to let you know when he has to go! (I usually if having no company coming over run in bday suit and he goes when he feels it)

    Reply

  2. KalleyC
    Jul 21, 2011 @ 02:54:42

    Oh I feel your pain. I’ve been told and nagged about training my daughter when she was 18mo, but I honestly didn’t want to clean up poop and pee all over the house. She’s gotten to the point when she tells me that she pooped, but I need her to tell me before she goes.

    Next time someone asks if your child is going to stop using diapers, ask them if they are going to train them for you.

    Reply

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