What’s that in your mouth?!

I was tempted to title this post “you are what you eat” but that would  be cruel.

Sunday night, after dinner, the baby was completely coated in food. Head to toe. It was that slimy, yet crusty, nastiness that calls for an immediate bath. My husband took our 14 month old straight to the tub. A few minutes later, I hear my husband calling my name in a panic. Now moms, you know when you hear a panicked voice and the baby is in the tub your heart starts racing a million beats per minute. I feared the worst. I ran towards the bathroom screaming “What happened?!” His response? “Just come look!” Okay, surely if this were a life threatening situation his response would not have been “Just come look.” Terror level falling to orange.  I walk in to the bathroom. There he is- our sweet little baby boy, surrounded by his bath toys and yep,  particles and chunks of poop floating in the water.

It always amazes me when a parent freezes up and can’t do what obviously needs to be done. I’m not saying I’m perfect. I couldn’t and wouldn’t have anything to do with either of my sons’ circumcision wounds. Just couldn’t do it. Anyway, my husband seemed unable to pick the baby up out of the poop parfait. And that’s where the title of this post comes into play. As I reach for our toddler, our toddler reaches for something too. Before I can stop him, he’s fished a little something out of the tainted water by his leg. He scoops it up between his thumb and forefinger, the way he would a cheerio, and curiously puts that little piece of poo right into his mouth.

Horrified. Disgusted. Alarmed. You name it, I felt it. I snatched the baby out of the tub but the not-so-tasty morsel was already down the hatch. The damage had been done. My husband took the baby to the tub upstairs in an attempt to rinse off the poo layer and I went to work on transforming the newly found septic tank back into what used to be our bathtub. (A lot of antibacterial spray went into that project.)

We left the twice bathed baby and the two older (and not poop covered) kids with my mom and left for a few hours. (Mind you, it’s a regularly scheduled class we left for and not the incident that drove us from our home.) We returned to find the baby had been throwing up nearly the entire time. The barfing went on until Monday morning and he hasn’t eaten more than a few orange segments since.

Yesterday, I called the doctor. I tried not to go in, but they wanted to see him. He wouldn’t even eat the popsicle the doctor bribed him with. Apparently, once you’ve had a taste of poop, you’re a little hesitant to put anything else in your mouth!

The doctor said he’ll be okay and to watch for signs of dehydration. I’m sure he’ll be fine once the poo has passed… again.

So, moms and dads- what’s your worst baby poo story? Eating out of the kitty litter box? Painting the walls of the nursery? Do-do tell.


2 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Kara
    Apr 07, 2011 @ 08:24:18

    Lucas and Connall finger painted the entire bathroom. Floor, walls, toilet, bathtub, each other. I’m not sure which part was worse – the fact that were waayyyy old enough to know better, or the fact that they had to go… ahem… fishing for the “paint.” Took me roughly 6 hours to disinfect every surface of that room. Yech.


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