The “I’m sick” Scam

Ferris Bueler was the king of the “I’m sick” scam. He had the thermometer to the lamp thing and the sweaty palm tricks down. He could fake his way to chemo, if he wanted to. What amazes me, is that kids think they were the first to come up with this idea. When our kids want to fake sick, they complain of the same things over and over again. Hey man, at least change it up. “My stomach hurts.” “I have a headache.” You gotta venture outside the norm to get my attention. My eight year old daughter truly thought she could pull a fast one on me. Last week, she called home from school sick. The principal put her on the phone and I said the best line I think I’ve ever said in this instance: “do you want to come home now and go to bed or do you think you can stick it out a few more hours at school?” Guess who was miraculously better? Something about the threat of having to go to bed…
And that’s another thing. At what point do you start wanting to lay in bed instead of hating it? There’s some invisible barrier you cross between child and teen years where the bed all of a sudden becomes a great womb-like place you yearn to return to. Weird.
Maybe faking sick as a kid just prepares you to fake it in other things in life…


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